Ok, so it will be almost two years of being married this February. Family and relatives have started asking about kids... which makes me think a lot, will I be a good parent?

I love kids, a lot! On my recent India trip, I spent most of my time with a 1.5 year old nephew and 2.5 year old niece. I had so much fun with them and I am sure even they had as much fun. Their parents tell me the kids miss me and I miss them too. If I did not have any other work, I would have spent all my time with them.

But I can never think of having my own kids. I am not sure if I will be able to take good care of them. I am very careless about eating right, and I am scared that attitude of mine will affect my kids. It is a lot of responsibility, life time responsibility. When I think about my past as a kid, I can imagine what my parents had to go through. Agreed that they give you the love that is not comparable to any other love in this world, still I am not ready.

I am also not ready because I am not sure what the future looks like for us... Financially, there is no problem now, but who knows what it will be like in the future. How much money saving is enough to have kids? There are so many uncertainties in life and growing up another life in such uncertainties will make life more complicated. Life never feels settled, ever.

I am not ready for having a kid now, and I am not sure when I will be ready.